December 14, 2037
Today I scheduled an appointment with my sleep counselor. I’m not very surprised – my SmartPillow’s been sending me warnings for having a lower-than-average sleep quality for the past week. I guess it got tired of my procrastination and then automatically slotted me in with Dr. Mackenzie for next week? I’m glad it didn’t accidentally doublebook me – I heard that happened to Sharon’s friend once. I think the new update really did it wonders – you can’t even feel the wires and circuits anymore!
I wonder why my sleep quality’s so low. Usually I average around 90% but I’ve been in the low 40’s lately. Maybe it’s all the stress from those private-transit activists? Jeez. They just make me so… ugh. I mean, it’s not like there’s anything wrong with public transit. It’s actually gotten a lot better, especially since they integrated a couple hundred new variables into their AI and began utilizing deep learning (finally, oh my goodness). Even buses are barely 2 minutes off schedule now, so in downtown Toronto there’s really not much of a need for private transit. Besides, those new self-warming, self-cleaning adjustable seats are just divine. Just let go of your gas-guzzling Honda and get on a streetcar, honestly.
Also, I’m thinking about filing a complaint with our unit’s new food delivery service. I’m not sure exactly who we’re with now, but they’re supposed to be tracking my cooking and eating habits. I say “supposed to be” because clearly they’re not – I haven’t eaten meat in over ten years, but what do I find in my weekly delivery box? A chicken breast. Not even cricket or soy-based. Clearly their data’s faulty, or they’ve mixed me up with Mrs. Williams next door again. I think she brought chicken to last month’s potluck, although it might’ve just been one of those freeze-dried things that always make me think of astronauts. What are they called again? Instameals?
Speaking of food, I finally got the new Tasty mouth implant! Honestly, it’s incredible. 34.5% more accurate than last year’s version. Nice to know exactly what my carb:protein:fat ratios are, and it doesn’t glitch out if the food I’m eating is too hot. Just wins all-around. Hopefully this time they aren’t selling my data to third-party companies. I think, after all those lawsuits, they learned their lesson. No company wants the government to ban them from the country, and Canada very nearly did. Martha swears they’re still doing it but just more underhandedly, but I think she’s just being paranoid. Ever since Canada (and the world, really) started cracking down on monopolizing, revenue-orientated, amoral companies, things have really started getting better! Granted, the new implant upgrade cost me over $400 more than it did a couple years ago, but at least my information stays private (hopefully). No more strangely specific advertisements about the carbohydrate content of bread. My intake percentages are safe!
Also, I finally figured out how to stop those annoying notifications on my SmartGlass. Do you realize how absolutely irritating it is to have that SmartGlass synced up with everything else? As I’m brushing my teeth: Angle toothbrush slightly more to the right. Lighten force used – as if my toothbrush isn’t already telling me! As I’m making breakfast: Ingredients detected: eggs, cheese, salt, pepper. Macronutrient ratio: 20:50:30. Requires more carbohydrates. Maybe tomato? – as if I won’t get that exact same reminder ten minutes later from my Tasty implant. Geez, it’s just so… unnecessary. I mean, I bought the glasses because they let me read the news without having to use my phone, but I can do without the constant barrage of information sometimes.
Sorry to cut this short, but the AI doorman just told me that my mom’s here on one of her surprise visits – she’s coming up the hallway right now, and I haven’t even turned on my CleaningPal! I really should get the automatic ones that detect cleanliness – there’s dust everywhere – but anyways, until next time!